Mentor's Moments

Safe Places

We are into the swing of a new MOPS year, and isn’t it fun? As women move into friendships, we tend to open ourselves up. Seeking advice or sympathy, we share funny and personal stories about ourselves and our families. Guess what happens? We become very vulnerable. Should we go home and panic lest something we said be spread about? Do you remember the “Gossip Game” we played as kids? You started a whispered comment into someone’s ear, and it was passed down the line. Remember what came back to you? Certainly nothing like what you started!

MOPS must be a “Safe Place.” As we give each other the most precious gifts we have—our confidences—I urge each of us to treat these as treasures. As we move in a high level of Trust, we must be worthy of that Trust. I don’t want anyone to go home and think: “I really should not have shared that.” Even worse, I don’t ever want a MOPS Mom to hear her confidence repeated in a negative, hurtful way.

A West Virginians for Life’s Volunteer wrote me a thank you note, and she said: “. . . you are the same whether we are alone or at a national convention.” God being my Helper, I strive to be Open and Transparent. I don’t come to you as the perfect mom, telling you how I did it and you should, too. I come to you as a forgiven sinner, who is willing to share her countless mistakes and the God Who allowed me to have a part of the lives of five wonderful adult children.

By His grace, you, too, will one day look at your adult children and say: “They are my best friends.” I find that one of my life’s greatest rewards. Your kids will see you at your very worst (because they know what buttons to push to get you there!), and they will choose to forgive you and to love you. You’ll find some of your worst disasters will have become your family’s most delightful and funniest stories. Believe me, it is much funnier looking back than it is living though them. Don’t take yourself so seriously. Remember your worst mistakes are just the jokes of tomorrow.

With love and trust,

Charlotte Snead

Mentor Mom

October, 2002